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poem/story

When You Seem Stuck, Help Arrives On Time

Teresa Allen
tabeautywithin@gmail.com
https://wordpress.com/view/beautywithin5.home.blog
https://wordpress.com/view/encouragement978384461.wordpress.com

During My Isolation Period

When You Seem Stuck, Help Arrives On Time

I’m climbing a wall
Stuck can’t get out
I look to the left
I look to the right

The wall is long
It is thick
I’m surrounded with noise
Of reasoning with destitution

The memories fall upon me
It hurts like hell
I can’t do this anymore
My time has acquitted

Without love, without fault
I fought, fought
No circumstances, no happiness
Joy, peace, where the hell are you

Time changed against me
No one came
No one rescued me
Not even love, life, or peace

Where did they go?
Where are they
When I needed them
They are all desolate

Found out many things
As this wall caved in on me
It caved so hard
I forgot about love
I forgot about family
You see family lies within
Within is where success lies
I discarded family as an obsolete
And said to family I don’t need you

I was crazy as hell
As the next person continued
To drive me insane
To drive me right to a mental institute

What has happened to me?
What is wrong with me?
What has driven me to this point of craziness?
I know what did it

Love, freaking out of love
Love sustain me
Love kept me from desolate situations
Love kept me hindered to the point of death
Within my own being

Love conquered me
Gave me lust
Gave me lies
Gave me up to the gods of the underworld

What gods
Who are they?
Where do they come from?
All created by God himself

How could a God, a true Living God
Give up His biological children
To the underworld gods
Without dedication, without truth

The true Living God
Held His biological kids
And gave them to gods
Of this underworld
To be forgotten
To be lied on
To be slaves to them
To not to ever see them again

Is there a true Living God
Where is He at
I can’t find Him
He is lost within Himself

Captivated in, some say lust
Some say love

The Story behind the scenes

But the Spirit that dwells within
Says He is a coward

A coward for leaving His own
A coward for burning His own
To live a life of freedom
A freedom that captures all
That belongs to the underworld

The Spirit says,
The underworld is a place all true believers, true Christians goes only to observe, only to be recognized and that they don’t belong to this world of benevolent, a world of desolate, lack, or a world of no justice, no fairness.

The Spirit would also say this is compromise to death when death arises believers are forsaken to the point where death over takes them and then they are surrounded with so many circumstances, so many losses, so many ups and downs, twist ,turns, not including all the mountains needed to be climbed during the whole entire process.

Those that dwindle the process come out on top, those that fail at this process still goes to live a just life but not the life God ordained.

Let me rephrase that, no one fails this only because God has that believer soul, but yet instill God destiny for that soul will not be accomplished only because this soul gave up to the point and said no thank you, you are jerks, you are ass holes.

But yet instill, God says this soul has been through so much in a lifetime, so much of never getting a break in life, so God says I will give this soul time off, well serve My faithful servant, you done an awesome job in portraying Me in the image I created you to be, and that is My image and My likeness.

So God gave this soldier of war not just that this is a soul that cared and loved all no matter what the circumstances were so God gave this soul many new opportunities to come forth into a new likeness of Him.

He failed to tell the soul that these new opportunities would not only take place spiritually, but even physically this person would get so tired of these things and want to stop it.

But even so what’s done is done. It’s open to the point of being over, over as being no more, no more as sudden changes quicken to the point where God says it’s time to give my faithful servant a time of gifting, a time of removal from life and circumstances.

So life goes on for this begotten soul that everybody forgot about at least that is what that soul thinks at the time. This soul moves on to a new life full of constant love and dedication from not only God, but from all her true family that lies within, but soon to find love in romance, and in partnerships.
These things shall take place quickly and suddenly to the extent of love in proposal of marriage.

The After Effect

I was completely surrendered to the Most High. I was going through a cycle of Life itself, taking out and removing things that were not of me whom the Most High created me to be. We all go through some of these stages in Life to overcome good and evil.

The experience was torture. I wrote exactly how I felt at that moment and I can honestly say at that time I thought I wouldn’t ever give up, but soon enough good and evil came along and hypnotize me and I said God take this shit and give it to the rainbow. In the Living Bible where does it say I have to do this? I was hurt and mad.

God politely said didn’t you promise my son Jesus that you will finish till the end. I said yes, but I didn’t sign up for this shit. This is horrible, terrors of the night. I feel like I am fighting a whole army of these lower gods, one hundred one is the number. God completely said all is well; you will surely make it out alive. I got this. You are no different than my other children, if they did it you can too. I said God please have mercy on my soul. He politely said, I already have, you have to work now my child and although it won’t be easy I will lead, guide, and direct thee. I promise and I promise to never leave you or forsaken you. They can’t do any more than what I allowed. I said a curse word to myself and He said I heard that. I ever know your utterance and your murmur. He said your crying, hurts and pains will not be in vain. I have done this so many times that they all call me by my name Above, not beneath. Meaning my child, they are all beneath me; they can’t harm a fly unless I say so.

I said God, why I have to go through so much. I have been in this long enough. He said this time around I am keeping watch, the first time your natural birth parents did. I want let you sleep or slumber, you will succeed and you will overcome all obstacles. He said I love you unconditional, there’s nothing I want do for you. You are my knight and shining armor of love. You are my bundle of joy and I care deeply for you. You have grown to be a well known soldier in my palace. This palace my child is so beautiful that you don’t have to leave your backyard. I said what you mean Father. He said everything I could ever give you in this world dwells within you. The fight is over. It is all about what you are willing to give up, let go of to become one with me and He smiled and said it’s done.

Although it took a few more years to finish the work in me, I didn’t leave empty handed. I came out of the promise land and discovered hell is all about sin, the more sin you have the more hell is in you, but to become closer to God, the Most High you have to conquer everything in hell, whether you did it or not.

So after that conversation God remained silent again. I was like okay now He left me in this shit with these bills, all this debt because of this spiritual warfare taking place. How is I’m going to get out of this? I am tired of this shit; I am tired of this shit. By the way my frustration stayed to myself, the curse words I used was me sitting alone and expressing the way I felt at that moment. God knew that. To be honest I really didn’t start cursing until these lower gods came around torturing the hell out of me. But I truly never curse unless it was a release to get something out that has been bundled up and God will take that bundle of shit and make me release it.

So I was covered with debt on the outside while the inside was spic and span, clean, spotless and sure enough goodness and grace showed up and provided not leaving out favor. Those three bundle of joy I was happy to see. My back was killing me to the bones and I couldn’t carry any more weight, if I did God would be of dishonor and even I know He alone gets the glory, He wouldn’t dare share it with the lower gods where they can build a picket fence or wall to separate us again. So He brought me out of Egypt and all the pharaohs couldn’t open their mouths, but looked and snorted. Sometimes you don’t know who is watching, but God does. So God took all my losses and put it into a lottery machine and said in this lottery machine I am making an investment in you and out of you. I will bless you and prosper you and make your name great, but it will not come how you think it will. He said I want you to keep doing what you are doing today and watch and see what I want do for you, I will honor thee and glorify thee and what is owed to you shall be paid and multiplied.

I can honestly say, I didn’t utter a word and I opened my eyes all the way and realized He just had giving me a new direct contact with Himself, direct access with no restrictions. I now can go directly to the Living Source, My God, my God supplies all my needs according to His riches and glory. I just grew an inch and a half. This was one of my heart desires, you see the day I surrendered I asked God to do several things for me during this process before I agreed to anything. Not one of them was money, it was building a kingdom to last through generation to generation to generation, so that the blessing will not just be on my name, but my children, grandchildren, great grands, not one will be lost. God promised me some things along the way that I didn’t ask for, so today right now He gave me a new gifting sharper than a two-edged sword 12-3-19 at 8:38 p.m. He gave not only the gift of Life, everlasting life, but He gave me a prophetic gift that we talked about earlier on during my proclamation. A new discovery, I receive it. Thank you Lord. Tears of joy and happiness, no words to say, but thank you Lord, I glorify you, I praise you night and day, all day. I love you. Amazing Grace. Amen

*Here’s a PDF file of this story:  Duringmyisolationperiod

Originally created February 5, 2017
© All rights reserved. No part of this story may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the author.

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